It all began with the iPhone

Submitted by Karen Jones

March was when our son celebrated his 17th birthday. We got him an iPhone. He loves it. Who wouldn’t?

I celebrated my birthday in July. My wife made me very happy when she bought me an iPad.

Our daughter’s birthday was in August, so we got her an iPod Touch.

My wife celebrated her birthday in September, so I got her an iRon. It was then that the fight started.

What my wife failed to recognize is that the iRon can be integrated into the home network with the iWash, iCook and iClean. This inevitably activates the iNag reminder service.

I should be out of the hospital next week. iHurt.

Never hike alone

Submitted by Philip Keever

On Bud’s Forums, the question came up: What is the smallest caliber you trust to protect yourself?

My personal favorite bear defense gun has always been a Beretta Jetfire in 22 short! Over all the years I’ve been hiking in bear country, I never leave without it in my pocket.

Of course, we all know the first rule when hiking in the wilderness is to use the “Buddy System.” For those of you who may be unfamiliar with this, it means you NEVER hike alone. You always bring a friend or companion, even an in-law. That way, if something happens there is someone to go get help.

I remember one time hiking with my brother-in-law in northern Utah. Out of nowhere came this huge bear and man, was she MAD! We must have been near one of her cubs. Anyway, if I had not had my little Jetfire, I would not be here today.

That’s right. One shot to my brother-in-law’s kneecap and I was able to escape just by walking at a brisk pace.

That’s one of the best pistols in my safe!

At 83, I feel like a baby

Submitted by Charles Gross

Two elderly gentlemen were sharing a park bench enjoying the sun when one turned to the other and said, “Ralph, I’m 83 years old now and just full of aches and pains. I know you are about my age. How

do you feel?”

“I feel like a newborn baby,” Ralph replied.

“Really?” The other man asked. “Like a new born baby?”

“Yep,” Ralph responded. “No hair, no teeth and I think I just wet my pants.”

I love my grandkids

Submitted by Jacque Stafford

My young grandson called the other day to wish me “Happy Birthday.” He asked me how old I was, and I told him 62. He was quiet for a moment and then he asked, “Did you start at 1?”