By Teresa Ambord

Not much money for Christmas presents this year? That might give you the blues, but it shouldn’t. Look at this as a chance to readjust your focus. If you put your heart into it, when your family and friends look back on this holiday, it won’t be the lack of presents they remember.

Years ago, the economy was thriving, but my husband and I were in our own recession. As a young man, Mike’s temper and other habits caused him to lose job after job. We barely covered our basic expenses every month. So at Christmas time we assumed we would not be able to buy gifts for each other at all. That was our life then.

One year, some friends gave us a small Christmas tree, which I decorated with hand-me-down ornaments. Just before Christmas, Mike got paid and we wrote out our bills as usual. To our amazement, there was an extra 20 dollars in the bank. It wasn’t much, but to us, it felt like found wealth. We divided it, and each set out with ten dollars to spend on the other. I shopped carefully for Mike’s present, then wrapped it and hid it. Looking back, I can’t remember what I bought for him.

But I’ll never forget what he gave me.

A couple of days before Christmas he went shopping. He was gone a long time, and then finally he poked his head in the front door.

“I’m going next door to wrap your presents,” he said with a huge smile. An hour later he returned, carrying a bag and wearing a Santa hat that our neighbor, Pam, had given him. He made me close my eyes while he hid the bag.

The next morning Pam came over for coffee after Mike went to work.

“Mike must really love you a lot,” she said.

“I hope so,” I said, wondering what made her say that.

“When he showed me what he bought you, he was so excited his hands were shaking. It was so sweet. I had to cut the paper for him,” she said.

Pam’s words were exactly what I needed to hear. My life with Mike was so full of difficulties that each day felt like a struggle. I knew he loved to give gifts. But I wasn’t so sure that he still loved me.

Finally it was Christmas morning. As soon as the smell of coffee reached him, Mike bounded out of bed and dug in the closet. Then he appeared, carrying four small presents as if they were fine china. He set them in my lap, and then sat on the floor in front of me, watching my face and waiting for my reaction.

The first package held green socks-–my favorite color. Happily, I put them on. Then Mike handed me the next package, which was also socks, but red.

He pulled off one of my green socks and replaced it with a red one so that I looked more Christmasy.

“I got those because your feet are always cold,” he said. “And I know you love new socks.”

He was right. I still love new socks. It felt good to know that, even in the chaos of our daily lives, he remembered the things and colors I liked best. Quickly he urged me to open the other two packages, one of which turned out to be a tube of mascara, and the other, a container of eye shadow. They were exactly what I would’ve bought for myself if I’d had a few extra dollars. The colors and brands were perfect. But I was baffled. Mike never paid attention to girly things like makeup.

“How did you know what I wanted?” I asked. “I was almost out of both of these. And how did you know the colors and brands I like?”

“Before I left for shopping, I looked in your makeup bag,” he said. “I wrote down what you were running low on. I know you like to have makeup and nice things. But with our money, you can never buy anything for yourself.”

My mouth fell open. I pictured my tall, rough-around-the-edges husband, plodding down the makeup aisle at the drugstore looking for the things on his list. Knowing Mike, I assumed the list was written on his hand, and it was. The thought he put into buying these things for me was amazing. No amount of money could’ve replaced that consideration.

That’s the Mike I want to remember. He was a troubled soul with seriously destructive habits that took a heavy toll on our family and on his body. Because of that, he passed away too young. Our years together were tumultuous, but they weren’t all bad. Some stand out like pockets of calm in a long storm.

For me that Christmas, it boiled down to one thing. Mike knew me. He could have bought any old thing. Instead, he went to great effort to see me smile when I opened his packages. That was the true gift. That was 26 years ago. But today when I think of Mike, that Christmas is the memory I choose.

Whether or not money is short this Christmas, our extravagances should not be in the money we spend. It should be in the thought we put into finding what warms the hearts of our loved ones and makes them smile down to their souls. Anyone can do that. Merry Christmas!

For your $10 Christmas

Do you have a long list of people to shop for this Christmas and not enough money in the bank? Great gifts don’t have to be the latest music device or a new flat screen T.V.

I’m not saying you should be “cheap,” but for those of us on a tight holiday budget, here are some inexpensive Christmas gift ideas, which when given a little thought and effort (maybe a pretty bow and a basket), can be something your loved one of any age will adore and appreciate.

• Wine stopper
• Plants or seeds
• Scented soap or bath products
• Chocolate
• Gourmet treats (coffee, popcorn, jams, cheese, mustards, etc.)
• Teacup with box of herbal tea
• Filled photo album
• Home baked goodies
• Locally made honey or barbeque sauce
• Craft supplies
• Framed art
• Coasters
• Recipe book
• Book of puzzles (crossword, Sudoku, etc.)
• Board games
• Pet treats
• Ornaments
• Books and movies
• Music (maybe an iTunes gift card for the tech savvy senior)
• A one-year subscription to the BEACON! It’s only $15, and in December, you can receive two for the price of one! A subscription for yourself and one for a friend. Mail-in the forms on pages 20 or 37, or call us at 243-8829.

Happy Holidays from The BEACON!